His Richest Aunt

Elephant

Gleanings from How to Be a Motorist (1939) by K.R.G. Browne with illustrations by Heath Robinson:

“This handy, decorative, valuable, and uncostly volume, on which so much loving care and ink has been expended by the compilers, is dedicated in admiring sympathy (on the artist’s part) and sympathetic admiration (on the author’s) to that badgered but unconquerable little creature, the British Motorist, or fate’s football.”

“As one trudges along life’s highway, humming an old Andalusian air and in momentary peril of annihilation by mechanically propelled vehicles…”

“Like the mind of a Cabinet Minister — or a hen under the influence of vodka — the early motor-car moved in such mysterious ways that it was often hard to say if it were coming, going, or just oscillating slightly.”

“In very large and costly cars, such as those in which financiers and film stars visit their aged parents in the almshouse…”

“The urge to take his car abroad for a spell, thus Getting Away From It All, is one that attacks every motorist occasionally, usually after a heavy meal of cold boiled pork or on learning that his richest aunt has left her all to a Cats’ Home.”

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